Gender differences

This is long, but really interesting.

"Sizing Up The Sexes" by Christine Gorman

More men than women are left handed; more women than men listen with both ears, men favor the right ear.

Men and women perceive the world in different ways. Men excel at rotating three-dimensional objects in their head. Women prove better at reading emotions of people in photographs. However, there's much overlap.

Women have a double dose of the large "X" chromosome. Men have a single "X" and a short, stumpy "Y". Normal men also are affected by a larger level of testosterone (hormone) while their mothers are in pregnancy.

In men the hypothalamus (small organ near the brain stem) is larger than in most women. When provoked, the hypothalamus heightens rage, thirst, hunger and desire; possibly explaining boys' more rambunctious behavior.

In most women, the corpus callosum is larger. This thick bundle of nerves allows the right half of the brain to communicate with the left. This may help explain women's intuition and ability to read emotional cues. There may be other areas where the woman's brains have more connections then the man's.

This greater communication between sides of the brain may be a distraction when, for example, reading a map. Men are more able to rotate the images in their heads, women tend to need to turn the map around.

For both sexes, the principal language centers of the brain are usually concentrated in the left hemisphere. Because women use both sides of their brain, their appreciation of everyday speech appears to be enhanced by input from various cebral regions, including those that control vision and feelings. Thus girls often begin speaking earlier than boys, enunciate more clearly as tots, and develop a greater vocabulary.

by J Madeleine Nash

Men tend to be far more upset by a lover's sexual infidelity than do women: just imagining their partner in bed with another man sends their heart rate soaring by almost five beats a minute.

Women react more strongly to the threat of emotional infidelity. What women fear most is the loss of their mates' long-term commitment and support.

Larry Crabb, "Men and Women", Zondervan Publishing, Grand Rapids

Men see themselves more as separate individuals, achieving something; women more as persons whose identity is found in relational attachments.

"Instead of attachment, individual achievement rivets the male imagination."

For men, the dominant ideas are: separateness, achievement, entering.

For women, the dominant ideas are: involvement, attachment, invitation. This is symbolized in the sexual relationship, "men feel complete as they strongly enter; women feel enjoyed as they warmly invite."

Masculinity is at its best when men "enter their worlds with a humble but confident intention to do good". Femininity at its best when women "invite people into their worlds to experience the joys of relationships".

Women are focused on the strengthening of relationships, encouraging others, deepening attachments.

Willard F.Harley, Jr., "His Needs, Her Needs", Fleming H. Revell Company, Tarrytown

Man's five most basic needs in marriage:

1. Sexual fulfillment

2. Recreational companionship

3. An attractive spouse

4. Domestic support

5. Admiration

Woman's five most basic needs in marriage:

1. Affection

2. Conversation

3. Honesty and openness

4. Financial support

5. Family commitment

Concerning sexuality: men experience arousal and climax with relative ease; for women it's just the opposite.

THE IRRESITIBLE MAN

1. He meets her need for affection with plenty of hugs and kisses at every opportunity.

2. He meets her need for intimate conversation by talking with her at the feeling level.

3. He meets her need for honesty and openness by looking her in the eye and telling her what he really thinks.

4. He meets her need for financial support by firmly shouldering the responsibility to house, feed, and clothe his family.

5. He meets her need for family commitment by putting his family first. He commits his time and energy to the moral and intellectual development of his children.

THE IRRESITIBLE WOMAN

1. She meets his need for sexual fulfillment by becoming an excellent sexual partner to him.

2. She meets his need for recreational companionship by developing mutual interests with her husband.

3. She meets his need for her attractiveness. She keeps herself physically fit with diet and exercise, and she wears her hair, makeup, and clothes in a way that her husband finds attractive and tasteful.

4. She meets his need for domestic support by creating a home that offers him an atmosphere of peace and quiet.

5. She meets his need for admiration and respect by understanding his value and achievements more than anyone else.

John Gray, "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus", HarperCollins Publishers, New York

Men value power, competency, efficiency and achievement; looking to prove themselves, develop power and skills. "Their sense of self is defined through their ability to achieve results." More interested in "objects" and "things" rather than people and feelings. Achieving goals is very important - to prove competency. Rarely talk is about his problems unless he needs expert advice. When his wife talks about problems he is quick to offer advice, to solve the problem, to fix it.

Women value love, communication, beauty, relationships. Spend time supporting, nurturing. Sense of self defined through their feelings and the quality of their relationships which are more important than work and technology. Intuitive, anticipating the needs of others. For women the sign of love is to offer help without being asked.

For men, the offer of help suggests he isn't competent, she doesn't trust him to do it himself. "For women, offering advice and construction is an act of love."

Men feel better solving problems. Women feel better talking about problems.

When men are under stress, they tend to want to be alone, to think about how they can solve their problem. When a women is stressed, she wants to talk it out; talking about the problems causes her to feel better.

When a woman talks to a man about her problems he feels she is holding him responsible. When a man doesn't talk about his problems his wife feels he is ignoring or rejecting her.

Men need to know they are needed. Women need to know they are cherished.

Women express feelings, men communicate information.

Men need trust, acceptance, appreciation, admiration, approval, and encouragement.

Women need caring, understanding, respect, devotion, validation, and reassurance.

Men typically handle arguments with "Fight" and "Flight" - intimidation or become silent; women with "Fake" and "Fold" - pretend there's no problem, or take all the responsibility for it.

Men think they score big points with big gifts; women score all gifts the same.

Women intuitively feel the needs of others and expect men to do the same.